Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Me and Mr. Walker 

  TCB - Contributing Writer for Packer Palace.
Post-season, post-draft, pre-training camp.  Call it what you want but this is an historically late piece for me.  Haven't been able to spend much time with Mr. Walker these past few months.  I started another new job, quit the old ones, and have just been jammed.  Heck, I haven't talked to my parents in a while.  The Packers suffered a true meltdown to end their 2004 season--the kind of game that in some circumstances can change the direction of a franchise.  This game was a much, much worse loss than the one at Philly last year.  In that game Green Bay was clearly the better team, but let one slip away thanks to a few missed calls and fourth and 26.  Against the Vikings this year, the team was simply atrocious.  The varied from solid (but unspectacular) on offense, to rotten on defense, gave up four turnovers with no takeaways, and even the kicking game was uninspired.  Longwell missed one, and his kickoffs were shorter than any game I can remember this year.
This time around we'll go all the way back to the playoff loss, but more importantly we'll also consider the entire season since the last playoff loss.  We'll also try using some war fighting theory to do so, and of course we'll be looking at the offseason and try to figure out what the Packers need to do to get back on top of the NFC.  Finally, writing this piece has been great fun all year--thanks again to the Packer Palace guys for letting me carry on.  If they'll let me I'll chip in with a pre and post draft column and then kick it back into gear when training camp opens.  So when I say Go Packers!  I now mean the 2005 Packers.


We begin with what I wrote only a few days after losing to the Vikings...

Click here to read the rest...

Saturday, June 18, 2005

John Elway... 

John Elway, after living a full life, died.  When he got to heaven, God was showing him around.  They came to a modest little house with a faded Broncos flag in the window.  "This house is yours for eternity, John," said God.  "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here."  John felt special indeed, and walked up to his house.  On his way up the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner.

It was a 3-story mansion with a Green and Gold sidewalk, a 50-foot-tall flagpole with an enormous Packers logo flag, and in every window, a Cheesehead.  John looked at God and said "God, I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question.  I was an all-pro QB, I won 2 Super Bowls, and I even went to the Hall of Fame."

God said, "So what do you want to know, John?"  "Well, why does Brett Favre get a better house than me?"  God chuckled, and said "John, that's not Brett Favre's house, that one's mine."

Thanks to Beerscout's Dad for sending us this one...

The Creation of Wisconsin... 

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days.  Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day.  He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"  God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made."  Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?" 
"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put Life on it.  I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."  "Balance?", inquired Michael, still confused.  God explained, pointing to different parts of earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East there will be a hot spot. 

Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries.  "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." 
The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a large land mass and said, "What's that one?"  "Ah," said God "That's Wisconsin, the most glorious place on earth.  There are beautiful lakes, rivers, sunsets and rolling hills...  The people from Wisconsin are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they are going to be found traveling the world.  They will be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. 

"Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God?  You said there would be balance!"  God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the idiots I'm putting around them in Minnesota, Illinois, and Iowa ."

Thanks to Lee for sending this one in to us...

Now For Something Completely Different... 

Here's an entry for the "Favorite Lawn and Garden Ornament" hanging in your kitchen category from yours truly.

Friday, June 17, 2005

Sasquatch Newspaper Stories from the Past 

OK, these links will lead you to the stories I compiled into the book "Big Newsprints - Sasquatch, Bigfoot, Wildmen, Yeti & Other Strange Animal Reports from the Past."  Sasquatch stories going back to 1764!  Including the CAPTURE of an 8' 3" wildman with 2 cubs in Minneapolis in 1839!

You can read the nearly 400 stories I found here at the Bigfoot Forums.

Or in graphical preview format here from the Gaudet Photo Gallery.


Priscilla's Bigfoot...

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

The Hairy Man... 

Here's a great overview of the Hairy Man - Mayak Datat: An Archaeological Viewpoint of the Hairy Man Pictographs from Kathy Moskowitz Strain over at the Bigfoot Information Project.

Painted Rock is located on the Tule River Indian Reservation in central California.  This rock art site is unique; It's most unusual feature is the presence of an entire Bigfoot family.  Besides the male Hairy Man, there are also a female and child "bigfoot", but also because of the traditional Native American creation story by the Yokuts Tribe that accompanies him, Mayak Datat - The Hairy Man. 

Condor said, "People should be different from us, so give them hair, not feathers or fur to keep warm."

Then Coyote said, "People should be just like me, because I am smart and tricky, so have them walk on all fours."

Hairy Man, who had not said anything yet, shook his head and said, "No, People should walk on two legs, like me."

All the other animals agreed with Hairy Man, and Coyote became very angry.  He challenged Hairy Man to a race, and they agreed who ever won could decide how People should walk.

Hairy Man Wallpaper Image

The above material on Mayak Datat, the Hairy Man is from the work of Kathy Moskowitz Strain and the original artwork of Jennie Franco.

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Bad Man Of The Woods... 

 The bad man of the woods am I,
   I grit my teeth and wildcats quail;
I frighten wolves to death and tie
   Knots in the frightened grizzly's tail.
The lynx is doomed that I pursue,
   The panther fears to cross my path;
I tear the catamount in two
   And crunch the pieces in my wrath.

I drink hot blood and eat raw meat,
   My snort's a thing to terrify;
Wild things behold me and retreat,
   The bad man of the woods am I.

S.E. Kiser, in The Outer's Book, re-published in The Daily Northwestern, May 8th, 1907. Transcribed from Sasquatch, Bigfoot, Yeti and Other Strange Animal Reports From The Past, www.mcclean.org, 2005.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Bigfoot's In The House... 

5x8ft vinyl wallposter hanging in Beerkid's living room.

We've always been told that we have a "healthy" fascination with a certain primate that roams through out the forests of North America and other remote area's of the world.  So with summer break finally upon us, and not much Packer news to keep us occupied, we've decide to proclaim that this week is "Sasquatch Week" here at Packer Palace. 

So enjoy a pleasant diversion for the next few days catching up on all the Sasquatch folklore that's out there, and rest assured, that we'll be getting back to Green Bay Packers business soon enough. 

Ummmm, maybe that was an "unhealthy" fascination for a certain primate in North America...

Sasquatch In Wisconsin? 

Ever wonder if Bigfoot has been sited in the county that you live in?  Here's your chance to browse through the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization's (BRFO.Net) geographical database of Sasquatch Sitings in North America. 

This is where you can find out if Bigfoot has been stomping through your neighborhood or favorite campground! 

Go ahead and check out Wisconsin or the United States here.

Bigfoot Songs... 

Check out one of our new friends, Tom Yamarone, with his Songs for a Bigfoot World website that we just helped set up. 

Tom's written some pretty clever Sasquatch related campfire folk songs.  Recently he played at the 2005 Sasquatch Research Convention in Bellingham Washington. 

Check out the song clips at his CD page for a musical taste of Bigfoot.  He's soon to be a Cult Classic!

Strange Howls... 

Early American Stories of Animal Encounters and Other Oddities

Noted for their possible relation to Sasquatch

A historical collection culled from the Library of Congress online archives.

Now is just as good a time as any to go read Strange Howls at McClean.Org and don't miss out on Big News Prints; Sasquatch, Bigfoot, Wildmen, Yeti and Other Strange Animal Reports From The Past! coming soon.

Bigfoot Times Newsletter... 

Check out another one of our friends, Daniel Perez, and his Bigfoot Times website that we helped launch earlier this year. 

He is the founder of the Center for Bigfoot Studies and editor/publisher of the much talked about and hard hitting newsletter, the Bigfoot Times, which has appeared since its debut in 1979. 

Check out his Bigfoot at Bluff Creek book, the definitive story of the Patterson-Gimlin film that rocked the world.

Adventures Of Jack Squatch... 

Check out the 5 episodes of the "Sasquatch Is Real" Adventure Series.

The Debut Of Packer Palace... 

Here's the original web post that declared the beginning of Packer Palace back in November 1995 when Patty our loveable Sasquatch had a late-season tryout at Linebacker for the Packers.

"I turned in time to see it throw the blocking sled 40 feet!"

Packer Training Camp, WI - Veteran analysts agree that they've never even heard of such a thing. But that's not stopping the forward-thinking Pack in their quest for new talent! Non-stop reporter Beer Kid infiltrated the secret "tryout" and captured a remarkable photo of the event. Beer Kid offered no apologies for the poor quality, stating "Hell, between the smell and flying epuipment, I'm surprise I got a shot off at all!" The extra-species event lasted only 15 minutes before the (apparently female!) sasquatch let out a scream, tossed a blocking sled, and charged off into the forest.

Packer Fans with information regarding this sighting are urged to contact beerkid@packerpalace.com.

The Legend of Packsquatch... 

        The Debut of Packsquatch!

Bay Wars I - The Oakland Dentist

        New York New York!

Jurassic Jim's They Might Be Giants

        Get Back!

Fools Rush Gold

        Playoffs Got You Hungry?

Mutton Chop Mike's Lack of Ram

        Must See TV!

Forget The Titans

        I Love Spam!

The Spam from Frisco

        Take Me Out!

The Ballad of Stevie McCrockett

        Ester's Got The Rope Tight!

The Snow Lions

        It's A Green Bay Picnic Party!

Bugged By Brownies

        Incognito In Cincinnati!

Costume Contest

        Pittsburgh's Going To The...

Steely Dancers

        Welcome To The Most Hazardous Place On The Planet!

March Of The Holmgren

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Speak Out Spew Off... 

We get an update from Boz who revealed some of those rumors that our defense may be on the improvement, something that going to be needed this year.

Duke and I were over in GB yesterday (8/10).

1) Spoke to a forever Packer fan who said the Packer defense looked “excited”, “moved fast” and “flew to the ball” on Thursday.

2) This fan also said Free Agent WR, Chad Lucas, #10, was making some great moves and catches!

3) Asked a Packer staffer about Aaron Rogers. Quote “I think he’s gonna be a good one, I really think he’s something special”.

That’s it, just the good. No Bad or Ugly… it’s too early. Go Pack, Go!


Feel free to stop by the forums at packerchatters.com to post a message.  GBXU

Got your message Vix, I am registered at Packerforum.com. Just started posting on there today. I heard the NC newspaper site is closing down as is the paper. What a shame. I felt like family. TYVM. Catch you on Packerforum?

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Looking for PackerChick... 

We've been asked to pass this along to PackerChick and anyone else who may have frequented the recently deceased Packers Forum at the GB News Chronicle's website.


Do me a favor.  The GB News Chronicle abruptly closed their forum without warning.  I know Packerchick visits packerpalace.  Leave her a message that many of the old Chronicle posters are attempting to regroup at packersnews.com or at packerforum.com.




We're happy to oblige...
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